Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New 'Intelligent Falling' Theory

nerfball · 07-21-2006, 08:59 AM

Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New 'Intelligent Falling' Theory

KANSAS CITY, KS—As the debate over the teaching of evolution in public schools continues, a new controversy over the science curriculum arose Monday in this embattled Midwestern state. Scientists from the Evangelical Center For Faith-Based Reasoning are now asserting that the long-held "theory of gravity" is flawed, and they have responded to it with a new theory of Intelligent Falling.

"Things fall not because they are acted upon by some gravitational force, but because a higher intelligence, 'God' if you will, is pushing them down," said Gabriel Burdett, who holds degrees in education, applied Scripture, and physics from Oral Roberts University.

Burdett added: "Gravity—which is taught to our children as a law—is founded on great gaps in understanding. The laws predict the mutual force between all bodies of mass, but they cannot explain that force. Isaac Newton himself said, 'I suspect that my theories may all depend upon a force for which philosophers have searched all of nature in vain.' Of course, he is alluding to a higher power."

Founded in 1987, the ECFR is the world's leading institution of evangelical physics, a branch of physics based on literal interpretation of the Bible.

According to the ECFR paper published simultaneously this week in the International Journal Of Science and the adolescent magazine God's Word For Teens!, there are many phenomena that cannot be explained by secular gravity alone, including such mysteries as how angels fly, how Jesus ascended into Heaven, and how Satan fell when cast out of Paradise.

The ECFR, in conjunction with the Christian Coalition and other Christian conservative action groups, is calling for public-school curriculums to give equal time to the Intelligent Falling theory. They insist they are not asking that the theory of gravity be banned from schools, but only that students be offered both sides of the issue "so they can make an informed decision."

"We just want the best possible education for Kansas' kids," Burdett said.

Proponents of Intelligent Falling assert that the different theories used by secular physicists to explain gravity are not internally consistent. Even critics of Intelligent Falling admit that Einstein's ideas about gravity are mathematically irreconcilable with quantum mechanics. This fact, Intelligent Falling proponents say, proves that gravity is a theory in crisis.

"Let's take a look at the evidence," said ECFR senior fellow Gregory Lunsden."In Matthew 15:14, Jesus says, 'And if the blind lead the blind, both shall fall into the ditch.' He says nothing about some gravity making them fall—just that they will fall. Then, in Job 5:7, we read, 'But mankind is born to trouble, as surely as sparks fly upwards.' If gravity is pulling everything down, why do the sparks fly upwards with great surety? This clearly indicates that a conscious intelligence governs all falling."

Critics of Intelligent Falling point out that gravity is a provable law based on empirical observations of natural phenomena. Evangelical physicists, however, insist that there is no conflict between Newton's mathematics and Holy Scripture.

"Closed-minded gravitists cannot find a way to make Einstein's general relativity match up with the subatomic quantum world," said Dr. Ellen Carson, a leading Intelligent Falling expert known for her work with the Kansan Youth Ministry. "They've been trying to do it for the better part of a century now, and despite all their empirical observation and carefully compiled data, they still don't know how."

"Traditional scientists admit that they cannot explain how gravitation is supposed to work," Carson said. "What the gravity-agenda scientists need to realize is that 'gravity waves' and 'gravitons' are just secular words for 'God can do whatever He wants.'"

Some evangelical physicists propose that Intelligent Falling provides an elegant solution to the central problem of modern physics.

"Anti-falling physicists have been theorizing for decades about the 'electromagnetic force,' the 'weak nuclear force,' the 'strong nuclear force,' and so-called 'force of gravity,'" Burdett said. "And they tilt their findings toward trying to unite them into one force. But readers of the Bible have already known for millennia what this one, unified force is: His name is Jesus."

looks like gravity > Jesus

JaJae · 07-21-2006, 09:00 AM

Originally Posted by nerfball

looks like gravity > Jesus

HAHA that gif is amazing.

Scrum · 07-21-2006, 09:36 AM

That's perfect.

I hope someone who believes in ID/Creationism reads this to see how silly they look.

6SpeedTA95 · 07-21-2006, 09:51 AM

Ohhh my, that jif (you know like the penut butter) makes me

but

at the same time

lew · 07-21-2006, 10:00 AM

Originally Posted by Scrumtralecent

That's perfect.

I hope someone who believes in ID/Creationism reads this to see how silly they look.

That article was funny, but it's arguments are not the same as the ID crowd.

Scrum · 07-21-2006, 10:02 AM

Originally Posted by lew

That article was funny, but it's arguments are not the same as the ID crowd.

Yes it is...

ID is just watered down Creationism anyway to get their foot in the door.

lew · 07-21-2006, 10:05 AM

Originally Posted by Scrumtralecent

Yes it is...

ID is just watered down Creationism anyway to get their foot in the door.

Not really.

And besides, "ID" and "Creationism" don't mean that much anyway by themselves. Creationism can mean literal Genesis 10,000 years ago, theistic evolution, or any other amount of theories.

Scrum · 07-21-2006, 10:11 AM

Originally Posted by lew

Not really.

And besides, "ID" and "Creationism" don't mean that much anyway by themselves. Creationism can mean literal Genesis 10,000 years ago, theistic evolution, or any other amount of theories.

None of which are science based on empirical observation and sets itself up with the ultimate "I'm just right because I believe" scenario by saying it was an omnipotent being who is infallable, invisible and infinite.

SICKGUY · 07-21-2006, 11:59 AM

According to the ECFR paper published simultaneously this week in the International Journal Of Science and the adolescent magazine God's Word For Teens!, there are many phenomena that cannot be explained by secular gravity alone, including such mysteries as how angels fly, how Jesus ascended into Heaven, and how Satan fell when cast out of Paradise.

i feel sorry for anyone schooled in kansas

Ardentfrost · 07-21-2006, 12:04 PM

Please tell me that article isn't real. It's from the Onion, right?

nerfball · 07-21-2006, 12:08 PM

yeah, its from The Onion... from last year. I came across it again and had a good laugh.

but wait! unrefutable evidence that the creatonism story is true!!!!1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPL1G...ch=creationism

wow. all I can say is wow.

DosEquis · 07-21-2006, 01:03 PM

Originally Posted by nerfball

yeah, its from The Onion... from last year. I came across it again and had a good laugh.

but wait! unrefutable evidence that the creatonism story is true!!!!1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPL1G...ch=creationism

wow. all I can say is wow.

pre-flood

Scrum · 07-21-2006, 01:15 PM

Originally Posted by nerfball

yeah, its from The Onion... from last year. I came across it again and had a good laugh.

but wait! unrefutable evidence that the creatonism story is true!!!!1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPL1G...ch=creationism

wow. all I can say is wow.

I can't believe people buy this crap.

Scrum · 07-21-2006, 01:39 PM

He talks about the NWO and blames them and Marx for public education where the curriculum is corrupt.

TekDragon · 07-21-2006, 02:45 PM

Originally Posted by Scrumtralecent

That's perfect.

I hope someone who believes in ID/Creationism reads this to see how silly they look.

You have no idea what ID is and no idea how many blatant flaws are in the current evolutionary theory.

Scrum · 07-21-2006, 02:49 PM

Originally Posted by TekDragon

You have no idea what ID is and no idea how many blatant flaws are in the current evolutionary theory.

Let me guess, you just read Coulter's book and now your an expert on evolution?

Edit - And that makes ID or creationism more correct why?

TekDragon · 07-21-2006, 03:15 PM

Originally Posted by Scrumtralecent

Let me guess, you just read Coulter's book and now your an expert on evolution?

I guarantee you spend more time listening to Coulter than I do, since i've never even watched her show. But good job proving you're nearly ignorant on evolutionary theory if you think that the only people who find it full of flaws are right wingers

Scrum · 07-21-2006, 03:17 PM

Originally Posted by TekDragon

I guarantee you spend more time listening to Coulter than I do, since i've never even watched her show.

She has a show?

Originally Posted by TekDragon

But good job proving you're nearly ignorant on evolutionary theory if you think that the only people who find it full of flaws are right wingers

The only people who point out flaws in Evolution and expect that to make ID or Creationism more correct are right wingers.

Ardentfrost · 07-21-2006, 03:19 PM

Originally Posted by Scrumtralecent

She has a show?

The only people who point out flaws in Evolution and expect that to make ID or Creationism more correct are right wingers.

A better way to say this is "Showing flaws in one theory doesn't prove another. That is the logical fallacy called 'False Dilemma'"