Humanity is awry.

IminWonderland · 12-15-2007, 12:23 PM

Yesterday on the way home from the park, I was rear ended.

I had the kids in the car, and before I could unbuckle my seatbelt, the guy who was driving came up to my passenger side and opened my door. He was telling me not to call the Cops, he had a DUI, no license, and his friend had just lost his job (what the heck did that have to do with anything?). I told him to chill, because my Husband was on his way, and I got out to check on the kids who were crying and scared.

When I got to the other side and made sure they were OK, I looked up, and the jerk and his friend got in the car, and took off.

The cops came, but they aren't going to do anything.

The only damage was my bumper, and my Husband fixed it already (it was just off the bolt and not worth calling insurance.

I wasn't even mad about the car, and I was glad the kids were OK.

But I was disgusted by that POS leaving the scene.

Further what infuriates me, is that as a woman, all I could think about was making sure my kids were alright, and I was blinded and didn't think to get their plate numbers before I did anything. I hate it that I felt so vulnerable, being a woman, with two small children, it was so helpless, I despise it.

JaJae · 12-15-2007, 01:09 PM

I understand where you're coming from. It sucks you couldn't get their plate as they drove off.

I was in an accident with a drunk driver once. He ran a red light coming out of an intersection that was lined with trees. I didn't see him until the last minute and swerved to avoid. I would have hit his driver's side door at about 60mph, but instead swerved and hit the trailer of his pickup. I swerved to the right knowing thinking it would be better to hit his trailer than have him hit me head on or his driver's side door.

I felt like I did him the favor. He gets out of his car drunk as hell yelling at me for running the light. His air bag went off and he was probably too drunk to feel anything. I on the other hand was injured pretty badly and was taken to the ER in an ambulance. My knees went through the dash, my face hit the steering wheel causing my teeth to go right through the skin below my lip, after my face hit the wheel it bounced up and my head shattered the windshield.

I was pretty banged up. I hobbled out of the car to check on him and he starts yelling at me for running the light. If I had the energy I would have killed him.

Apparently he was very intoxicated and driving a company car at 2am in the morning. So he was scared as shit and tried blaming me. I was pretty pissed off at how someone could be so irresponsible and not take responsibility for their actions. Luckily an off-duty state policemen was stopped at the next traffic light and saw it.

motivez · 12-15-2007, 02:46 PM

That really sucks, but making sure the kids are okay is more important than getting insurance information or the guys license plates, so I think your priorities were in the right place.. and after an accident like that no one is going to be clear headed enough to make sure they do everything they need to immediately

I was driving home from classes one day, and there's a right turn at a light where the cars making a left turn going the other way will often get far enough out and turn after the light is red, so people turning right often have to wait 5-10 seconds for them to finish

I was sitting there waiting, and I notice in my rear view mirror that this lady is talking on her phone with what was probably her daughter in the passenger seat and not paying attention, and she slams into to me, but manages to brake enough that it's not much more than a tap, there's not much damage to the bumper

Bitch has the nerve to get out of the car and yell at me because "The light was green!" .. like the light being green means you don't have to slow down if there is a car stopped in front of you? And maybe you would have slowed down had you been paying attention instead of flapping your gums on the phone?

People drive like morans, guys like that should be off the road forever though, DUI and no license?

Did you catch the make of the car?

IminWonderland · 12-15-2007, 04:10 PM

Yeah, I know the make, the first 4 digits and could totally pin him in a line up.

No accountability anymore. I hope he lives in my neighborhood. I know my Husband would like to show his bat to his car a couple times. :rollseyes:

So frustrating.

RMNIXON · 12-15-2007, 05:23 PM

One would think the first words would be "Is everybody OK?"

A woman with children in the car!

All this idiot could think of is violating his probation, and by the sound of your story I can see why. He should not have a license!

IminWonderland · 12-15-2007, 05:32 PM

Originally Posted by RMNIXON

One would think the first words would be "Is everybody OK?"

A woman with children in the car!

All this idiot could think of is violating his probation, and by the sound of your story I can see why. He should not have a license!

Yeah, like, what would his mother think about this? He left a woman with two small children to save his ass, I'm not sure if Chicken Shit has a larget definition.

thomez · 12-15-2007, 06:43 PM

I'm not sure that you were more vulnerable as a woman, hopefully a father with kids in the care would make that his #1 priority as well.

WickedLou9 · 12-16-2007, 06:30 AM

Don't feel bad. If I had my daughter in the car She would have been the first thing I checked on to make sure she was ok.

Screw that loser. NO skin off your back. That's what insurance is for. He'll get caught eventually. IF not for this then for something else

7960 · 12-16-2007, 09:11 AM

lots of sexism in this thread

glad you and the kids are ok

IminWonderland · 12-16-2007, 10:42 AM

Originally Posted by 7960

lots of sexism in this thread

glad you and the kids are ok

Well, the sexism was implied by my own conscience after the incident was over.

It's was a feeling like, having two small children handicapped me to deal with the situation because all I could think about was to check on them. And of course, that is exactly what I should have done, and I realize that.

But, it was a really vulnerable feeling, and as a woman it made me mad that someone could make me feel so vulnerable so easily.

It's like a time I was walking through a parking lot at Target, and this weird guy was walking around the cars. I had a cart with two kids, and bags, and was half way to the van, I had this scary feeling, if he tried to hurt me, what about the kids, do I run back into the store afraid? Do I just go to my car?

Sometimes I hate being a woman for these reasons. Because I want to be able to have that power to not be afraid. And it's beyond a karate class. It's just the idea that having children with me, puts me in a different spot. And I suppose it could transfer to a Dad. I'm sure it does.

RMNIXON · 12-16-2007, 04:27 PM

Is it really that sexist to consider a woman who is busy checking her children while this asshole takes off compared to a man with no kids in the car making sure this guy is not going anywhere? I guess that makes me old fashioned, but I see this driver using a concerned mom and children to his advantage and it sucks!

thomez · 12-16-2007, 04:32 PM

Originally Posted by RMNIXON

Is it really that sexist to consider a woman who is busy checking her children while this asshole takes off compared to a man with no kids in the car making sure this guy is not going anywhere? I guess that makes me old fashioned, but I see this driver using a concerned mom and children to his advantage and it sucks!

the point is that it doesn't matter if it was a mother or father, both would be checking on the safety of their children

ballz2wallz · 12-16-2007, 04:45 PM

Originally Posted by IminWonderland

I hate it that I felt so vulnerable, being a woman, with two small children, it was so helpless, I despise it.

I don't get the correlation, but it seems it's already been discussed.

Brings up an interesting topic though...is sexism brought on more from the 'victims' than anyone esle?

Roonie · 12-16-2007, 05:17 PM

I sympathize. A few years back around midnight some guy decided to play chicken with me at 50 mph in a split second. Needless to say I swerved last minute and he luckily hit me starting at the front fender and scraped all the way down the car instead of a complete head on collision which would have killed me. I was driving an old 79 Jeep CJ-7 with no seat belt. He hit me so hard on the side it flipped me several times. I was able to get out of the complete wreck barely and the dumbass with his 3 buddies comes up to me to see if he killed me. Once he saw me crawling he took off as he could barely walk he was so drunk. They put there car in reverse and almost ran me over as I had to jump out of the way literally or he would have hit me again. They took off and it happened so fast I never got the license plate number. I was in shock. Car was totalled by Insurance company so I got a little check for $2500 for what the car was worth. It was a deserted street and it was 30 minutes before another car came along so I waited. I had no cell phone on me.

I tried to follow the radiator fluid trail the guy left but it rained that night. People suck sometimes.

7960 · 12-16-2007, 05:17 PM

by sexist I meant all the "as a mother" and "being a woman" stuff....I got rear-ended on storrow dr and my first reaction was to go over the seat to make sure my son was ok.

I'd say "as a parent" or "as a responsible person" .......it's not just mothers and women that care about their kids enough to tune out the rest of the world when a child is scared or may be hurt

IminWonderland · 12-16-2007, 05:25 PM

Originally Posted by 7960

by sexist I meant all the "as a mother" and "being a woman" stuff....I got rear-ended on storrow dr and my first reaction was to go over the seat to make sure my son was ok.

I'd say "as a parent" or "as a responsible person" .......it's not just mothers and women that care about their kids enough to tune out the rest of the world when a child is scared or may be hurt

Oh, well of course not. A Father would probably react just the same. I felt tinged in my female-ness because I felt to shocked, scared, and inept, that I wondered that if I were male, my reaction would have been quicker. I mean, before I looked at the other car, I called my Husband to help me (he lives a block away from where it happened.) And then when the asshole came to my car, he rambled at me for about 90 seconds, and nothing clicked in me to really examine the situation. So, when I finally got out, and got my head straight, naturally to go check on my kids, it was already too late.

I know it could have been alot worse. I know that really, there was nothing more that I could do. But, I just wished that I didn't feel so unprepared, and helpless, and was instinctiveley faster.

Does that make sense? When I told a friend of mine this aspect, she understood?

IminWonderland · 12-16-2007, 05:27 PM

Originally Posted by RMNIXON

Is it really that sexist to consider a woman who is busy checking her children while this asshole takes off compared to a man with no kids in the car making sure this guy is not going anywhere? I guess that makes me old fashioned, but I see this driver using a concerned mom and children to his advantage and it sucks!

Well, I think he totally took advantage of my gender and the fact that I had chidren in the car. I wonder if it would have been the same situation, and my Husband driving, if it wouldn't have ended up a bit differently.

7960 · 12-16-2007, 05:49 PM

Originally Posted by IminWonderland

Well, I think he totally took advantage of my gender and the fact that I had chidren in the car. I wonder if it would have been the same situation, and my Husband driving, if it wouldn't have ended up a bit differently.

he took advantage that you were paying attention to the kids and your phone

I'd say being a woman didn't have much to do with it.

ballz2wallz · 12-16-2007, 05:51 PM

Originally Posted by 7960

he took advantage that you were paying attention to the kids and your phone

I'd say being a woman didn't have much to do with it.

Maybe she likes to think she's a victim of sexism?

thomez · 12-16-2007, 05:56 PM

Originally Posted by IminWonderland

Well, I think he totally took advantage of my gender and the fact that I had chidren in the car. I wonder if it would have been the same situation, and my Husband driving, if it wouldn't have ended up a bit differently.

I'm not sure how the presence of a penis would have changed the actions of your hit-and-run artist.