Go Back   The Liberty Lounge Political Forums > The Arena > No Holds Barred

Political Forum Click HERE to register your free account and become a member of our community today!
Register to Post a Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 07-03-2008, 03:56 PM   #1
America Fuck Yea
Election Moderator
 
kinggovernor's Avatar

Republican In Name Only
kinggovernor is a Distinguished Senatorkinggovernor is a Distinguished Senator

Lame Obama Joke

Dear Abby,

I am a crack dealer in Beaumont, Texas, who has recently been
diagnosed as a carrier of HIV virus.

My parents live in Fort Worth . One of my sisters lives in Pflugerville and is married to a transvestite. My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling marijuana. They are financially dependent on my other two sisters, who are prostitutes in Dallas.

I have two brothers: one is currently serving a life sentence at Huntsville for the murder of a teenage boy in 1994. My other brother is currently in jail awaiting charges of sexual misconduct with his three children. I have recently become engaged to marry a former prostitute who lives in Longview. She is a part time 'working girl'.

All things considered, my problem is this. I love my fiance' and look forward to bringing her into the family. I certainly want to be totally open and honest with her. Should I tell her about my cousin who supports Barack Obama for President?

Signed,
Worried About My Reputation
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 09-03-2008, 11:08 PM   #2
Lurker

Moderate
Sir John has political potential

Lol!
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 09-04-2008, 11:01 AM   #3
America Fuck Yea
Election Moderator
 
kinggovernor's Avatar

Republican In Name Only
kinggovernor is a Distinguished Senatorkinggovernor is a Distinguished Senator

Originally Posted by Sir John View Post
Lol!
lulz
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 09-04-2008, 02:38 PM   #4
ipsa Scientia Potestas est
 
motivez's Avatar

Pragmatist
North Carolina
motivez Has a place in history!motivez Has a place in history!motivez Has a place in history!motivez Has a place in history!

Didn't even crack a smile
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 10-06-2008, 12:16 AM   #5
Member
 
Heres Johnny's Avatar

Independent
Heres Johnny has political potential

Dear Rush,

I am a crack dealer in Beaumont, Texas, who has recently been
diagnosed as a carrier of HIV virus.

My parents live in Fort Worth . One of my sisters lives in Pflugerville and is married to a white supremist. My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling moonshine. They are financially dependent on my other two sisters, who are prostitutes in Dallas. And BTW I'm their best customer.

I have two brothers: one is currently serving a life sentence at Huntsville for the molesting of a teenage boy in 1994. My other brother is currently in jail awaiting charges of sexual misconduct with three alter boys. I have recently become engaged to marry a former prostitute who lives in Longview. She is a part time 'working girl'.

All things considered, my problem is this. I love my fiance' and look forward to bringing her into the family. I certainly want to be totally open and honest with her. Should I tell her about my cousin who supports John McCain for President?

Signed,
Worried About My Reputation and faithful Klan Affiliate
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 10-06-2008, 12:36 AM   #6
Anarcho-Aurelian
 
HughRuss's Avatar

Meritocrat
Chasey Lain
HughRuss is a Distinguished SenatorHughRuss is a Distinguished Senator

Originally Posted by kinggovernor View Post
Dear Abby,

I am a crack dealer in Beaumont, Texas, who has recently been
diagnosed as a carrier of HIV virus.

My parents live in Fort Worth . One of my sisters lives in Pflugerville and is married to a transvestite. My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling marijuana. They are financially dependent on my other two sisters, who are prostitutes in Dallas.

I have two brothers: one is currently serving a life sentence at Huntsville for the murder of a teenage boy in 1994. My other brother is currently in jail awaiting charges of sexual misconduct with his three children. I have recently become engaged to marry a former prostitute who lives in Longview. She is a part time 'working girl'.

All things considered, my problem is this. I love my fiance' and look forward to bringing her into the family. I certainly want to be totally open and honest with her. Should I tell her about my cousin who supports Barack Obama for President?

Signed,
Worried About My Reputation
Yay Racism.

-1
__________________
What do you get for pretending the danger's not real
Meek and obedient you follow the leader
Down well trodden corridors into the valley of steel
What a surprise!
A look of terminal shock in your eyes
Now things are really what they seem
No, this is no bad dream.
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 10-06-2008, 08:06 AM   #7
Braccae tuae aperiuntur.
 
JaJae's Avatar

Reform Party
NJ
JaJae is the Vice President!JaJae is the Vice President!

Originally Posted by HughRuss View Post
Yay Racism.

-1
The joke doesn't discuss race at all... that's your interpretation. These jokes are nothing new. They go around every election cycle.
__________________
No good decision was ever made in a swivel chair.
Senate Majority Leader, Harry Reid: As we look back in history, the Founding Fathers would be cringing to hear people talking about eliminating earmarks.

Last edited by JaJae; 10-06-2008 at 08:17 AM.
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 10-06-2008, 08:23 AM   #8
America Fuck Yea
Election Moderator
 
kinggovernor's Avatar

Republican In Name Only
kinggovernor is a Distinguished Senatorkinggovernor is a Distinguished Senator

Originally Posted by HughRuss View Post
Yay Racism.

-1
where is the racism, you fucking moron.
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 10-06-2008, 11:25 PM   #9
Member
 
Heres Johnny's Avatar

Independent
Heres Johnny has political potential

Originally Posted by kinggovernor View Post
where is the racism, you fucking moron.


So much for your speach on playing nicely with each other.
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 10-06-2008, 11:54 PM   #10
Anarcho-Aurelian
 
HughRuss's Avatar

Meritocrat
Chasey Lain
HughRuss is a Distinguished SenatorHughRuss is a Distinguished Senator

Originally Posted by kinggovernor View Post
where is the racism, you fucking moron.
Who said there was racism in the diatribe?
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 10-07-2008, 12:11 AM   #11
America Fuck Yea
Election Moderator
 
kinggovernor's Avatar

Republican In Name Only
kinggovernor is a Distinguished Senatorkinggovernor is a Distinguished Senator

Originally Posted by Heres Johnny View Post
So much for your speach on playing nicely with each other.
you really need to be careful how you talk about me on the forum, i dont appreciate it. tone down the disrespect, i dont know where you're from but where im from we dont tolerate that. dont even reply to this, just keep your mouth shut. consider yourself warned.
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 10-07-2008, 12:15 AM   #13
Member
 
Heres Johnny's Avatar

Independent
Heres Johnny has political potential

hey, there's a missing link here.
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 10-07-2008, 06:30 PM   #15
Member
 
Heres Johnny's Avatar

Independent
Heres Johnny has political potential

Yeah, the McCain one's much funnier.
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 10-07-2008, 09:02 PM   #16
America Fuck Yea
Election Moderator
 
kinggovernor's Avatar

Republican In Name Only
kinggovernor is a Distinguished Senatorkinggovernor is a Distinguished Senator

Originally Posted by HughRuss View Post
And where do I say "that joke is racist"?
I just stole your car, set fire to your couch, humped your girlfriend, ate your last piece of pizza, drank your last beer, shit on your coat, called your father a dingle berry, smeared KY jelly all over your toilet seat, called the police and told them you were mean to me, broke your calculator, made a flip book out of your post-it notes, wrote obscene messages on your driveway in sidewalk chalk, mixed up all your dress socks so you have one navy blue and one black one, left your refrigerator door open, left your freezer door open, left your front door open, asked your priest to excommunicate you, rifled through your mail but didn't find anything interesting so I put it back, switched your calender with a 1996 one, changed your screen saver to the windows logo, switched all your clocks back 1 hour, licked all your stamps and put them on the ceiling of your stolen car, made a random post trying to make you cry, invited twelve stray cats into your place and watching the sit on the burning couch, run up your long distance bill asking china if they really loved white rice, played darts with your neighbor, the dart board was the side of your house, I won, vacuumed your carpet then dumped the bag on your bed, set your bed on fire to watch the dust burn, it wasn't that interesting so I took a fire extinguisher and put it out, watched the couch burn some more cats, invited a stray dog over to chase the burning cats, got hungry again after eating your last piece of pizza so I ordered another one, its in your refrigerator but the doors still open, called your work and told them you died in a horrible gay experiment, told the same thing to your dad.
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 10-07-2008, 09:07 PM   #17
Member
 
Heres Johnny's Avatar

Independent
Heres Johnny has political potential

I believe you would bhave like this. Here's your sign.
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 10-07-2008, 09:30 PM   #18
Anarcho-Aurelian
 
HughRuss's Avatar

Meritocrat
Chasey Lain
HughRuss is a Distinguished SenatorHughRuss is a Distinguished Senator

Originally Posted by kinggovernor View Post
I just stole your car, set fire to your couch, humped your girlfriend, ate your last piece of pizza, drank your last beer, shit on your coat, called your father a dingle berry, smeared KY jelly all over your toilet seat, called the police and told them you were mean to me, broke your calculator, made a flip book out of your post-it notes, wrote obscene messages on your driveway in sidewalk chalk, mixed up all your dress socks so you have one navy blue and one black one, left your refrigerator door open, left your freezer door open, left your front door open, asked your priest to excommunicate you, rifled through your mail but didn't find anything interesting so I put it back, switched your calender with a 1996 one, changed your screen saver to the windows logo, switched all your clocks back 1 hour, licked all your stamps and put them on the ceiling of your stolen car, made a random post trying to make you cry, invited twelve stray cats into your place and watching the sit on the burning couch, run up your long distance bill asking china if they really loved white rice, played darts with your neighbor, the dart board was the side of your house, I won, vacuumed your carpet then dumped the bag on your bed, set your bed on fire to watch the dust burn, it wasn't that interesting so I took a fire extinguisher and put it out, watched the couch burn some more cats, invited a stray dog over to chase the burning cats, got hungry again after eating your last piece of pizza so I ordered another one, its in your refrigerator but the doors still open, called your work and told them you died in a horrible gay experiment, told the same thing to your dad.
I don't have a girlfriend
 
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Stumble Upon this Post!
Register to Reply to This Post
Old 10-15-2008, 10:45 PM   #19
Jedi Census Wookie
 
Photon1001's Avatar

Moderate
Planet Earth
Photon1001 is a jewel in the rough

Originally Posted by Heres Johnny View Post
Dear Rush,

I am a crack dealer in Beaumont, Texas, who has recently been
diagnosed as a carrier of HIV virus.

My parents live in Fort Worth . One of my sisters lives in Pflugerville and is married to a white supremist. My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling moonshine. They are financially dependent on my other two sisters, who are prostitutes in Dallas. And BTW I'm their best customer.

I have two brothers: one is currently serving a life sentence at Huntsville for the molesting of a teenage boy in 1994. My other brother is currently in jail awaiting charges of sexual misconduct with three alter boys. I have recently become engaged to marry a former prostitute who lives in Longview. She is a part time 'working girl'.

All things considered, my problem is this. I love my fiance' and look forward to bringing her into the family. I certainly want to be totally open and honest with her. Should I tell her about my cousin who supports John McCain for President?

Signed,
Worried About My Reputation and faithful Klan Affiliate
Sorry, I don't buy it. In real life, Worried About My Reputation and faithful Klan Affiliate would be selling crystal meth.